Outfit Selection Constipation

My friend Scott wrote this for Belinda. It relates to her search for a 'frock' she can wear to a wedding this coming weekend. I thought it was brilliant and laughed out loud when I read it at work -- hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Do you find that no matter how hard you try, that you simply can not select an outfit?

Do you feel disappointed and lethargic about your outfit selection efforts?

Does the thought of trying to find another outfit make you feel queasy?

If so, then you suffer from outfit selection constipation.


Outfit selection constipation is a problem that effects people as they get older.

It is caused by the unhealthy combination of too many bills and not enough money.

It is accentuated when combined with putting others before yourself

Do not despair, there is a cure.


When taken according to instructions, Spousal Intervention is 90% guaranteed of giving you the chance to relieve your outfit selection constipation.

Spousal Intervention involves relieving you of the selection decision, thereby relieving you of the guilt and burden so often associated with outfit selection constipation.

Simply take Spousal Intervention aurally and relax as your outfit selection constipation dissipates naturally.

Take Spousal Intervention and be free from outfit selection constipation.

(Spousal Intervention can be found for a limited time this afternoon at Chatswood)

Spousal Intervention is a registered Trade Mark of Wes Dart Industries. Contact Belinda Dart Pty Ltd for further information on outfit selection constipation.